Things that I have NOT done!

No, this isn't that game that you play where you go around in a circle and tell things that you haven't done...just to be totally embarrased to admit that you HAVE do something that you shouldn't have!

I’ve talked a lot about what I HAVE done for the wedding...the growing To Do List that some days gets shorter and some days gets longer. What I haven’t talked about lately? Things that I have NOT done and don’t plan on doing for our wedding.

When it’s not your first wedding, there’s not any help expected from parental units. As is only fair, I might add. I mean, they’ve already done this party once, right? Right. So paying for everything ourselves helped in some ways (no parents to argue with and kept the guest list down) but it also hindered us on other things that we might have splurged on if someone else were picking up a portion of the bill.

So here are some things that I haven’t didn’t spend my money on (or don’t plan on doing):

Day of Coordinator (DOC) – I would have loved to have spent some money on this, but it just wasn’t in our budget to do so, even though I found a local lady for just around $600. Yes, I would love to have someone totally unrelated and out of the mix there on our special day to make sure that the little details are taken care of. And I know that her fee would be worth every penny. But in reality? It’ll be a kind family member struggling to envision our vision for our day...following orders that someone (cough* me *cough) gives out. And I’ll love that person immensely. Volunteers? Just kidding!

Ceremony Musicians – if I had unlimited resources, I would hire ceremony musicians. I love a string guitar...not to mention instrumental jazz music...but hiring someone to play for just the ceremony wasn’t practical. So what does this mean to me now? On the bright side, it means that I get more control (read ALL control) over the music played at our ceremony. And since it’s not being done in a church, there are literally NO restrictions on what I can play. But that also means that I start from scratch on figuring out what to play. Which I haven’t done yet...relax, I still have 7 days, right? I guess that this would be the ONE exception on my “not planning on doing” statement above!

Relax Mom, I know that I need to take care of this...it just hasn’t been coming together easily for me. But I think that I’m on to something now...I’ll share in a few days, promise!

Appetizers – Here’s the deal. Our caterer doesn’t do appetizers. It’s a bar-b-que place, and I can’t complain with the rates that they’re charging us on per person costs – really excellent pricing! And since we choose not to do a “first look” this means that there is a cocktail hour. We talked at one time about trying to do some appetizers of some kind, but let’s be honest here. With no day of coordinator, that’s probably not going to happen. I might be able to sweet-talk some family members into preparing some cheese/crackers and possible a fruit tray, but that’s pretty much it. And I’m ok with that. To my way of thinking, it just means that our Cocktail Hour will TRULY be a Cocktail Hour. Drinks only. Is that tacky?

Limousine – We have a friend, who is gifting us a driver for the evening to get to our hotel. His brother owns a limo company here in Austin, and originally had told B that he would get us a limo for the night as our wedding gift. Knowing this friend (and how little he thinks about what he’s asking) and knowing that Saturdays have GOT to be a busy night for the limo business, I just sat back and watched this one unfold. You see, if it weren’t for our friend, I would be fine driving off in our own car. Yes, a vintage car or a stretch limo would be nice...but it’s nothing that I can’t live without. Oh, and the saga ended with the brother laughing at our friend...but he is providing a car (think 300) with a driver. Still a VERY nice and appreciated gift!

Special Toasting Glasses – Maybe this one is more because it’s not our first wedding...it’s not really a terribly expensive item to cut from the budget, but it’s something that we’re not doing. We’re Mason jar kind of people. Going out for pizza and beer IS getting dressed up and taking in the town for us! So toasting with our beverage of choice (with no champagne service at all – Gasp!) in our Mason jars suits us just fine.

Special chairs – oh wait, I DID rent special chairs...well, can I say that I used semi-good judgement and didn’t rent the most expensive ones? Will that count? I don’t know, you be the judge.

Videographer – yeah, NOT in the budget at all. Funny side story. At my first wedding, at the last minute my mom and I decided (or was it my ex?) to hire a videographer. I really can’t tell you where we found him, but the price was right and he was available. Now, I’m not trying to be racial or stir anything up, but this was a church wedding in deep East Texas...and he might have been the only African American in attendance. And he wasn’t dressed subtly. Yeah. With recurring nightmares of that happening again, the poorly dressed man who was in your face recording the event not the lone racial attendee, I never even mentioned to it to B. Plus, for a good one, it just wasn’t in our budget. I hired a fabulous photographer instead, splurging a little on my budget with her fee. I like to scrapbook, not watch videos, so pictures were of utmost importance to me.

Dance Lessons – We talked about this one off and on, and in the end just ran out of time. It wasn’t too expensive, so budget wasn’t a concern. Time was a factor. I really wish we had made time for this one...oh well, hopefully we’ll get through it.

There’s probably more that we’re not doing, but those are the ones that come to the front of my mind. I hope think that our wedding will be fine without these extras...and I literally mean crossing my fingers and toes, especially on the decision for no DOC.

What have you decided not to do? Do you regret that decision (if you’re already married) or are you second guessing that decision (if you’re not yet married)?