Making Love Last...and Last...Part IV

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This is it. The conclusion. The grand finale. The last excerpt from the article that I found in my last Glamour magazine. It offers little and big things that you can do either for each other, or as a couple, to help make your love last and last. I hope that you enjoyed Part I, found here and Part II, found here and Part III, found here.

Once again, I don’t want to plagiarize anyone, so here’s the link to the online version of the article...which will also give you a sneak peak since I’m not going to do the whole article in one post!

(**Update! A reader did inform me that the link provided back to the article isn't taking you to the exact article anymore...I will keep the link posted, in case Glamour reposts the article, but you'll have to just wait for the ending in my posts I guess - sorry for the inconvenience. I did receive my latest copy of Glamour in the mail, so maybe they only leave the articles up during the current month.)

The article focuses on things that you can do once a week, once a month, once a year and once a lifetime to help make your relationship better. Whether you’re just getting serious with that special someone, or if you’ve been dating a while, or if you’re like us and taking your relationship to that next level by marriage, or if you’ve already been married 2, 5 or 20 years this article will offer you some good advice.

Once a Week...
Let something go. Argue over stuff that matters, but once a week let him (and yourself!) off the hook for the things that don’t: Yes, he chews his popcorn loud. No, it won’t kill you.
Laugh so hard. Laughter is a relationship’s Krazy Glue: It bonds you. (My own tip – be yourself: crazy and silly and a whole lot dorky in the middle of a store – it’ll get you both cracking up!)

Once a Month...
Disappear alone. We’re not advocating game-playing, exactly. But in this world of 24/7 availability, it can be good for your relationship to each have some solo time. Afterward, you’ll feel recharged, like the free-spirited single girl he fell for once upon a time.
Go to a party! And mingle separately. It screams confidence and makes the after-party rehash even sweeter.
Have sex some way you’ve never had it before. A worthy challenge, whether you’ve been together 10 days or 10 years. Try a new position, buy a toy, play out a fantasy. Doesn’t matter whether it’s really new to you, as long as it’s new to you as a couple.

Once a Year...
Re-kiss your first kiss. All timid and hopeful...and hot.
Write each other. Little love notes. Long love letters. Just something to express your feelings in other ways.
Think back on all the reasons you fell for him, whether you’ve dated for a year or a decade. Some will be big (his extra-dry sense of humor); some will be small (his love of argyle). Make sure you tell him, and remind yourself. Hello, butterflies! There you are again.

Once a Lifetime...
Together, convince a skeptic pal to believe in love.
Have a poor phase. Maybe a rich phase, too.
Count the stars. Know your love is one in a billion.

Insert sourced from here.

Well, that was it. I hope that you enjoyed it, and I would like to thank the writers at Glamour for putting together something that really caught my eye and sparked an interest for me. I hope that you gained a tip or two that you can take into your life and your relationship to make it last...and last...and last...

Making Love Last...and Last...Part III

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Here’s the next excerpt from the article that I found in my latest Glamour magazine. It offers little and big things that you can do either for each other, or as a couple, to help make your love last and last. I hope that you enjoyed Part I, found here and Part II, found here.

Once again, I don’t want to plagiarize anyone, so here’s the link to the online version of the article...which will also give you a sneak peak since I’m not going to do the whole article in one post!

(**Update! A reader did inform me that the link provided back to the article isn't taking you to the exact article anymore...I will keep the link posted, in case Glamour reposts the article, but you'll have to just wait for the ending in my posts I guess - sorry for the inconvenience. I did receive my latest copy of Glamour in the mail, so maybe they only leave the articles up during the current month.)

The article focuses on things that you can do once a week, once a month, once a year and once a lifetime to help make your relationship better. Whether you’re just getting serious with that special someone, or if you’ve been dating a while, or if you’re like us and taking your relationship to that next level by marriage, or if you’ve already been married 2, 5 or 20 years this article will offer you some good advice.

Once a week...
Shower together. You’ve both got to get in there anyway, right?
Get into bed and...sleep. “Sometimes the best thing a couple can do to ignite their passion for each other is sleep,” says Hillsborough, New Jersey sleep expert Carol Ash. If you two aren’t in the sleepover stage yet, co-napping has been known to work wonders too.

Once a Month...
Declare something “this stays in Vegas.” A silly nickname, or a crazy sex mishap. Share something intimate, then pull the bubble completely around you tightly.
Be the man. Not literally, but if your guy always initiates dates, sex, whatever, take the lead for once.
Disappear together. Hike somewhere AT&T can’t find you (and thus your mother, your boss and his needy friend Bob can’t find you either). No woods? Any time spent totally alone together – a long drive, even – will do the trick.

Once a Year...
Fall Apart. You can’t schedule this. But it’s important that you each know; via experience, that you can completely, utterly lose your grip – weep over a bad haircut, threaten to leave your job after a nutso day, have a wrenching fight with your mom – and not lose each other.
Don’t. Get. Up. At least once a year, break open some bubbly, disable the Wi-Fi, and don’t get out of bed for the weekend.
Talk birth control. Not so sexy, but potentially life-changing. Would a different method work better? Is it his turn (or yours) to take primary responsibility? And where are you on the whole kid issue, anyway?

Once a Lifetime...
Go to each other’s “fun” high school reunions.
Pay off the mortgage!
Come back from the brink of a breakup even stronger.






Insert sourced from here.

Stay tuned for the conclusion to this series that I’ll post about next week. I don’t know about you, but I’ve seen a lot of things that I could totally work into our routine...especially if it helps keep our appreciation level for each other up!

Do you have any other tips that you’d like to share with me? Post about them below so that we can all benefit!

Making Love Last...and Last...Part II

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Here’s the next excerpt from the article that I found in my latest Glamour magazine. It offers little and big things that you can do either for each other, or as a couple, to help make your love last and last. I hope that you enjoyed Part I, found here.

I don’t want to plagiarize anyone, so here’s the link to the online version of the article...which will also give you a sneak peak since I’m not going to do the whole article in one post!

(**Update! A reader did inform me that the link provided back to the article isn't taking you to the exact article anymore...I will keep the link posted, in case Glamour reposts the article, but you'll have to just wait for the ending in my posts I guess - sorry for the inconvenience. I did receive my latest copy of Glamour in the mail, so maybe they only leave the articles up during the current month.)

The article focuses on things that you can do once a week, once a month, once a year and once a lifetime to help make your relationship better. Whether you’re just getting serious with that special someone, or if you’ve been dating a while, or if you’re like us and taking your relationship to that next level by marriage, or if you’ve already been married 2, 5 or 20 years this article will offer you some good advice.

Once a week...
And have before-work sex – Put down the straightening iron and heat things up this way. “Weekday morning sex is the secret sauce in a relationship,” says Tristan Coopersmith, 33, coauthor of Menu Dating.
Compliment each other. This one’s a daily to-do, if you can. There’s no nice thing that’s too small to mention: his excellent taste in music, the way he always opens the door for you – it’s all worth a verbal love tap.

Once a Month...
Talk about money. Whether it’s “Should we open a joint account?” or just, “Hey, let’s split the bill tonight.”
Brag publicly about him: his fearless pursuit of the mouse in your kitchen, the armful of hydrangeas he surprised you with, the raise he landed even in this economy. Surely once a month you can think of something that’ll make him blush in front of your friends. He’ll probably get you back too!

Once a Year...
Say the tough thing. The dark family secret. The crazy career dream. If you can’t confess to your significant other, then who?
Cancel Valentine’s Day and invent your own lovey-dovey holiday. Lobsterfest 2009, anyone?

Once a Lifetime...
Have sex someplace that you might be discovered.
Suffer through food poisoning together.







Insert sourced from here.

I’m not really certain about that last one...maybe it should be just suffer through an illness together – food poisoning sounds a little harsh to me!

Once again, I’ll keep posting the rest of this article’s advice in upcoming weeks. Are you enjoying this feature? Or would you rather I go back to talking non-stop about myself? J

Making Love Last...and Last...Part I

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I saw this article in my latest copy of Glamour magazine and thought that it would be a great one to share with my readers. It offers little and big things that you can do either for each other, or as a couple, to help make your love last and last. I don’t know about you, but I was thrilled to find a few things on their list that B and I already do!

So that I’m not plagiarizing anyone, here’s the link to the online version of the article...which will also give you a sneak peak since I’m not going to do the whole article in one post!

The article focuses on things that you can do once a week, once a month, once a year and once a lifetime to help make your relationship better. Whether you’re just getting serious with that special someone, or if you’ve been dating a while, or if you’re like us and taking your relationship to that next level by marriage, or if you’ve already been married 2, 5 or 20 years this article will offer you some good advice.

Here’s how Glamour introduces the article:
“Finding the guy is up to you, but we can help with all the rest. These pointers will encourage your love to grow, bloom, survive frost (yes, even the big-stress, no-money frost of ’09) and bloom again – maybe forever.”

I’ll post a few tips from each category each week. Here are the ones for this week:

Once a Week...
Fight (a little) – Getting your grrrs out keeps small annoyances from snowballing.
Have sex (obviously!) but have generous sex – You need at least one sexual connection a week that’s all about pleasing the other person

Once a Month...
Be do-gooders – Volunteering together (or even just helping a friend move) bond you because you’re ID-ing “common values” says Elizabeth Lombardo, a psychologist in Wexford, Pennsylvania
Do something scary – Been together a while? A pounding heart mimics the rush of brand new love, says Patti Wood, an expert on non-verbal communication in Atlanta. Fly in a balloon, or order the sweetbreads for two!

Once a Year...
Build a Doghouse – Or restore a Firebird. Or, OK, sew matching Star Trek costumes. Any team project “is fantastic bonding,” says Wendi Forrest, owner of Time for Nine, a golf dating service.
Now, get the dog. Or at least a plant. Anything that’ll grow with your love.

Once a lifetime...
Get lost together in a foreign country.
Damn the cost and go do the dream.

Insert sourced from here.

Once again, I’ll keep posting the rest of this article’s advice in upcoming weeks. Maybe it will help prepare my mind for that next big step that I’m taking...and help keep all of appreciating the one that we’re with!

Our Anniversary...

Today is a VERY special day. To me, at least. And probably to Mr. CC. I think that I’ve finally got him brainwashed, I mean, convinced that April 30th is our actual anniversary. Or, he’s just learning that it’s easier NOT to argue with me…LOL!

Yes, folks, today is our TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY of dating. So my post today is directed at one very special man…Mr. CC. Any man who is willing to be called Mr. Cotton Candy just HAS to be special! Or maybe that just goes to show how much he loves me? That's what I think.

There are so many things that I would like to say…I hope that I can do your love letters justice here, because you are SO good at writing me love emails…

First of all, I want to thank you for loving me. You honor me each and every day, in big ways and small ways. You shower me in love, the likes of which I never thought that I would personally experience. I met you at a time in my life when I had decided that I didn’t care if I stayed single forever, and I didn’t believe that true love actually happened in places other than books and movies. But you came into my life, first as a friend, someone to make me smile or laugh during a really difficult and emotional time after I had dissolved my previous marriage. You offered me nothing more, just a shoulder to cry on, someone to vent to, someone to help me laugh, someone that I could just be myself around, and you became so much more to me. But you became so much more. You became my best friend. I can’t imagine a day going by where you’re not the first person that I want to talk to (even when you hit snooze three times instead of getting out of bed!) or the first person that I want to share news with – good or bad.

From our very first date two years ago today, to the very first kiss, to our engagement and so many special moments along the way we’ve built our relationship to the point where we are now. You treasure me, you make me feel special, and you help me be the best person that I can be each and every day.

You allow me the freedom to just be myself. I think that I love that the most about us. Each of us are our own individuals, and we respect the similarities and differences between each of us, and love each other because of them or despite them, however you want to look at things. I’ve never just been ME when I’ve been in a relationship, and for the first time in my life, I’m able to do that. I can be a dork - I often crack myself up at my own jokes, stop in the middle of the store and start lip-synching the song playing over the loudspeakers and I know that instead of making fun of me for being that way that you’ll laugh along with me or you’ll be my back-up air guitarist without a word spoken to tell you to do that. That’s just how well we fit together.

I love that we laugh so much. We laugh ALL THE TIME. Everyday. In the past two years, I’ve never had so much fun in a relationship or laughed as much. Yes, there are fun days when you do things that are cool to do as a couple. I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about rolling on the floor, clutching your sides because you have a stitch in them from laughing, or racing to the bathroom because you laughed so hard you’re afraid that you might pee your pants kind of laughing. That’s what we do. I like to think that we do that every single day; and it sounds untrue, but there are very few days that we don’t laugh like that. I love that we laugh in the car, we laugh while watching tv, we laugh while we’re being goofy at the store or when we hang out with the kids, and that we lay in bed and laugh with each other on a daily basis. I honestly can’t think of anyone that I have ever had this much fun with in my whole life. If laughter’s the best medicine, then we’re gonna live for a long time…that’s for sure.

I love that you want to be part of my life. You honor me with your ring and the promise of marriage. And I mean that - I am truly honored to accept your marriage proposal. I want to be a part of your life with your family and I know that you feel the same way about my life and my family. You want to be a step-father to my child, and you want to have more children, and the thought warms me from the inside out that we will build a family together. You put forth an honest effort to be involved in my life, getting to know my family and as many of my friends as you can (since they’re scattered over everywhere!) and you don’t realize how much this means to me. I feel so lucky.

You make it easy for me to love you. I just want good things for you. You just want good things for me. In that way, we balance out each other and compliment each other perfectly, never leaving one person doing all of the work or getting all of the rewards. I’ve always been the giver in my relationships in the past; never really knowing what it was like to be on the receiving end of that equation. Maybe that’s the secret to a good, healthy relationship, because I can honestly say that there have been very few, if any, days when I’ve felt like our relationship is hard work. It seems like such a simple solution to a complicated situation, but it works for us. You look after me, and I look after you, and neither of us is lacking for anything. That’s the way that it is, and I hope that it will always be between the two of us.

I can’t wait to start my life with you. I can’t wait to say the words “I do” in October. I can’t wait to have another child with you, if that’s in the cards. I can’t wait to grow old with you. With you by my side, I know that my life will be good. There will be love. There will be laughter. There will be good times, and probably some bad ones too, but you’ll be there for me during those times doing what you do to be my rock and support. You’re a good man. And I consider myself a lucky woman.

So here’s to another two years. And two more. And two more after those two. Two more years for the rest of my life…I love you.

Miss Cotton Candy Needs to Vent...About My Ex

Allright, what’s the point of having a blog if you can’t just vent every once in a while? Right? Right.

Proceed with caution…not to anyone in particular, but I’m just really upset…disappointed…angry…I’m not really sure what I feel right now. Is all of the above ok?

You see it started out so innocently. For the last few years little CC has mentioned wanting to do a sport. But she didn’t know which sport that she wanted to do. We’ve done gymnastics and cheerleading, but unfortunately she is “blessed” with the natural grace and agility that both her mother and her grandmother possess…what a LUCKY girl. Did I mention prone to accidents too? Oh well. Moving on. So about 6 months ago, she got on this kick to join what she calls “soccerball.” Unfortunately at the time, it was mid-season so she had to wait until I could get her registered and on a team.

So last month, I sent in her registration to the local YMCA, and last week received an email from the YMCA’s organizer. He emailed the parents the team roster and let us know that at this time, there was no coach for this team. If any parents were interested in volunteering to coach, he would gladly help them through the process and there was a little seminar that the Y offered to help you be a coach and all. Like a dutiful ex-spouse, I forwarded the email on to my ex. (I mentioned earlier that little CC got her lack of grace from me, right? So I obviously can’t be the coach…)

I don’t know why, but I really expected my ex to step up here. He’s been hounding me and hounding me about this soccer deal. He was upset that I didn’t register her with the league out of Austin in the first place. In my defense, the price was triple what the YMCA wanted and since we don’t even know that she’s going to like “soccerball” I figured it wasn’t worth the price this first year. So he bugs me to get her signed up for soccer and then when he has the opportunity to be more involved with his child and something that SHE wants to do…he totally drops the ball. He says that he doesn’t have time. Well, that was his initial response. Then, when he found out that he (as the coach) would get to set the practice days and times, said he would think about it and contact the organizer about being the coach.

A week passes…the parents receive another email stating that we STILL don’t have a coach and our first game is Saturday, March 28th…

I forward the email on to my ex AGAIN, with a note this time asking him if he intended to do this or not. You see, what happened is when I went home the week before and told Mr. CC about little CC’s team not having a coach, he literally jumped out of his chair and said “I’ll do it!” I’m not kidding. Leapt out of the chair with excitement and enthusiasm for this opportunity.

To be fair, and to support Mr. CC in this endeavor, I did “clear it” with my ex. No, I didn’t ask for his permission, but I let him know that Mr. CC was willing to do it, and wanted to do it, just so that my ex couldn’t come back later and make a stink about it. I was honestly afraid that when my ex found out about Mr. CC’s interest in coaching, that he would then “all of a sudden” be interested and available to do it. His exact words over text to me concerning coaching were “I don’t know if I can. I know we want her in soccer but taking on a coaching job wasn’t really in my mind.” So I was afraid that once he found out that Mr. CC was willing to do the job, my ex would suddenly find the time. And that’s the wrong reason to coach her team.

I don’t really know if I’m shocked or not that he said for Mr. CC to go ahead and do it.

Typical, to be perfectly honest. He’s never followed through on most other things in life, so why start now? Take the glory, if there’s any to be had, and let someone else do the hard work. Then look back later and not be sure why everyone doesn’t like you…yeah, pretty typical.

So I started out being upset over this whole thing. But you know what I realized? I realized how lucky I am. How truly blessed I am to have Mr. CC in my life.

I love this man. With all of my heart. I love that he loves my child this much. That he is willing to be in whatever awkward situation that my ex will make of this…he knows how my ex is, and still offers to do this for little CC. I can’t say enough. I literally have tears in my eyes writing this post…I just never thought that I would be this lucky. I say a prayer of thanks as I finish up this post…

My special angel was really watching over me when she sent Mr. CC my way!